Backwards

In elementary school we used to have races on our playground.
Field Day’s… they would call them.

We would partner up…
contribute our athleticism to a team;
learn to depend on other people.

Three-legged races…
Leap frog…
Backwards relay.

Running backwards was always the worst for me.

There was always this fear of falling into that one hole that’s just the right size for your foot to fit into.

You lose your balance…
and then the race.

It didn’t ever make sense to me to run a race facing the wrong direction.
Why would you not want to see where you are going?

You start off slow…
Get your pace…
Watch your teammates get smaller as you head toward your goal.

All the while…
fearful of what you can’t see.
afraid of what’s behind you.

What will you run into?
fall off of?
or land on?

But lately, I feel like I have been doing this…

Running my own race backwards.
Looking back on what I’m leaving behind.

The thoughts of:
I should have done this differently…
I could have been better at this…
I’m too much…
I’m not enough….

All the reasons why my success doesn’t measure up to where I think it should be at this point in my life.

But there comes a time where we all have to turn around.

Stop looking at the past and look to the future.
Stop gazing at what once was and start dreaming about what could be.

There is always less fear when we can see what is coming.
There is always less risk when we can see where our next step will land.

Our vision is clearer.
Our hope is stronger.
Our pace is quicker.

We can dodge obstacles.
We can build bridges.
We can gather resources.

All we have to do…
is turn around.

The race is never easy…
But we make it harder when we try to do it facing the wrong way.

So, let’s start over.
let’s train differently…

This is a marathon.
Not a sprint.

Get to your starting block.
Focus straight ahead.
Find your pace…
Lengthen your stride…
and breathe.

You will get there…
You just need to turn around.

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